One of the Keys To Your Health and Fitness: Try Patience On For Size

I must make a confession. I am impatient.

In fact, I am the most impatient person I know. I’m not proud of it, but it is the truthjust ask those people who know me the bestmy three children, my mother, and my teammates, Diane and Katy.

They are so loyal that you might have to torture them so get the truth out of them, but, trust me, they well know the impatient side of me.

Well, this weekend I was tested with my 10,000th lesson in patience. I just hate those life lessons sometimes, don’t you? You’d think I’d learn this lesson after a while so I wouldn’t have to repeat it so often. Apparently, I have a ways to go (ahem!).

Long story short, I went skiing in Colorado this past weekend and missed my first flight home - oh, yeah, very dumb but true. So I had to fly stand-by. Scary thought, huh?

Whew - I had no problem getting from Vail to Denver. But the second leg of my trip to Seattle was completely booked and, worse, overbooked. In fact, all the flights from Denver to Seattle were completely booked until late that night.

The United person told me there was no way I’d get on the next flight (or the next one after that) home.

Mad at myself, I said a couple of choice words, like “darn it!” or something close to that! J!

I went to the gate anyway. I waited and waited and waited for the next flight. Waiting for this impatient person doesn’t happen to be her strongest suit.

I picked up my stuff to leave to find another airline home.

But, some voice deep inside said, “Be patient, Leslie, just be patient and wait.” So for once I listened. I sat down to wait some more.

Then my heart sank. You knowthat heart in your stomach feeling. They announced an overbooked flight and asked for 5 volunteers to give up their seats.

That was it. No point in sticking around. I picked up my stuff one more time to leave. I started walking away to try to find another way home.

But that voice piped up for the second time, “Leslie, be patient. Just wait.” So I sighed, put my stuff down, and plopped myself one more time back into my seat. I waited some more.

Another announcement: “We are still overbooked. We desperately need 5 more people to give up their seats.”

Okay, this time I couldn’t help myself, the tears sprung to my eyes. It was hopeless. Absolutely hopeless.

There was no way, no how, I’d get on that flight, and, not only that, now the next flight was overbooked as well, by ten people. I moaned out loud. I’d never get home.

I spoke to an agent, and she confirmed my fears. She said there was no way any stand bys would get on that flight, nor the next one.

Now I was totally down in the dumps.

For the third time, I picked up my stuff. This time I walked down the long corridor toward reservations to try to catch another flight home.

And then that pesky voice bugged me one more time, “Leslie, be patient. Go back, sit down, and just be patient.”

Amazingly enough, I listened. I walked back to the gate, sat down, and watched all the people board the plane.

I tried to stay calm, even if my hope had vanished.

The crowd of people disappeared on the plane, and there were a few of us stand-bys waiting. Just waitingI still didn’t know why I was still there.

It was hopeless.

Then this woman gets on the loud speaker. She called someone’s namenot mine. That person didn’t show up. Then I hear, “Would Van Romer come to the podium?”

I couldn’t believe my ears. I sprung up out of that chair, and they hustled me down the walkway to claim that last seat on the plane. When I stepped aboard, everyone clapped and cheeredlike I had done something extraordinary.

Well, to me, I had done something extraordinary. I had actually waitedsomething very difficult for me to do, especially with the odds facing me.

As soon as I settled in my seat, my eyes leaked one more time as I pondered the life lessons that I had just been gifted with:

#1: Listen for and listen to your inner voice. It speaks the truth. It will always guide you in the right direction.

#2: Be patient. Whether you are waiting for a plane or making healthy food and lifestyle changes (yes, always back to thatyou, too, know me well), it takes time and lots and lots of patience.

You will get off track. You will take detours. You will get stuck in potholes. You will face mental battles. You will doubt. You will even give up. That’s a given.

Patience with yourself will help you rise to the challenge of getting back on track once again and enable you to thrive from better food and lifestyle choices, one baby step at a time.

#3: No matter what, no matter how hard things get, there is always hopealways.

You never know what lies around the bendyou just can’t see around bends. But you can hope.

So, my dear friend, if your goal is to be active and purposeful for a long life, then stay the course of health- and life-supporting choices.

Listen to your inner voice, be patient with yourself, and, as long as you are breathing, never, ever give up hope.

This time, your flight through life, not just a flight home, depends on it.

Dr. Leslie Van Romer is a health motivational speaker, writer, and lifestyle coach. Visit http://www.DrLeslieVanRomer.com for more inspiration.

Word Sculptures of a Mystical Experience

The Mystical Experience

“The mysteries of life become lucid … and often, nay usually, the solution is more or less unutterable in words.” — William James, “The Varieties of Religious Experience”

I don’t remember who came to my door. I don’t remember what he said. I do remember he was angry.

I had just finished reading a book called “Summerhill” by an English schoolmaster, A.S. Neill. Its theme was ‘freedom, not license’. Each student in Neill’s school was free to do what he wanted as long as the conduct didn’t hurt someone else. The community Neill had created was a free, creative, loving, respectful, responsible interaction of unique human beings.

Recently, I’d been involved in disciplinary battles with one of my preschool sons. The battles resulted in increasingly destructive behavior in him and increased frustration in me. I decided to give Neill’s methods a try, with my own children and with other people in my life.

The man at the door wasn’t hurting me. I decided to allow him to vent his anger. I didn’t do it because it was something I ought to do. I did it because I chose to do it. I experienced acceptance of the anger and no desire to retaliate. Suddenly, the anger stopped.

Nothing changed. My house, the door, the living room, the man, were all still there, just as they had been five minutes before.

Yet everything changed. Suddenly, I understood the meaning of words I’d been taught as a child: “But I say unto you, that ye resist not evil; but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.” Matthew 6:39.

My five-year-old son Bill began wetting the bed after his youngest brother was born. At first, I ignored the bedwetting. Perhaps it would disappear. When it didn’t, I explained to Bill why he was too big a boy to wet the bed. The wetting continued. I reasoned with him, threatened him, screamed at him, and spanked him. The wetting continued. I felt angry and frustrated.

Neill frequently dealt with problem behavior by rewarding his students. While rewards for bad behavior didn’t make sense, nothing else had worked. Neill’s ideas worked with the man at the door. I decided to try them with the bedwetting problem.

The next time Bill wet the bed, I gave him a penny. He stared at me in confusion. The following morning, his bed was dry. He never wet it again. My anger and frustration disappeared.

What a powerful tool! I began using Neill’s ideas with neighboring children.

One day, two children were calling each other names in the back yard and threatening to fight. Instead of trying to stop them, I took each aside and asked him if he wanted to fight.

“I don’t want to fight,” each responded, “but he’s making me do it. He’s calling me names.”

“Do you want to fight?” I reiterated. “If so, go ahead and do it.”

The boys mumbled to themselves and looked at the ground. Two minutes later, they were happily playing together.

What I was doing contradicted everything society had taught me, but it brought the peace and harmony I desired. Society had taught me to punish people for ‘bad behavior’, but I didn’t punish them. Society had taught me to resist ‘evil’, but I no longer resisted. Society had taught me to fight for peace, but I no longer fought.

Instead, I simply detached from the anger and turmoil around me and allowed it to happen without responding to it. The anger and turmoil dissipated, and my life and relationships worked. By allowing myself to remain peaceful and harmonious, everything around me became peaceful and harmonious.

I had always understood Matthew 6:39 as an unattainable moral commandment, requiring subservience of my own needs to the needs of others. It wasn’t that at all. It was extremely effective action I could take all by myself, that benefited both me and others. There was no self-denial in that action. There was only self-affirmation and life affirmation. I had never before felt so free, so strong, so powerful, so integrated, so fully in control.

Nothing outside me changed. The only thing that changed was my own perceptions, thoughts, actions, and emotions.

What I experienced has been called a “mystical experience”.

As a child, I had been taught to doubt, question, and trust my own judgment. My upbringing didn’t include education about mystical experiences, but I knew that many religions included words about these experiences.

As I read William James’ “Varieties of Religious Experience”, and texts from Christianity, Buddhism, Zen Buddhism, Confucianism, Taoism, Islam, Hinduism, Plato, and existentialist philosophers, I could recognize my own experience in all the different words. It was as if different people were describing the same beautiful flower garden. Some talked about roses, some spoke of delphiniums, some noticed the color patterns, some focused on the trellises and paths. If I hadn’t seen the flower garden and were just listening to the words, I would have thought the people were talking about different things. Having seen the flower garden, I knew they were all giving verbal structure and form to the same underlying experience, just as our minds give form and meaning to the fixed lines of optical illusions.

I couldn’t stop playing with these ideas. Was my life the same or was it different? Did I know or did I know nothing? I wasn’t sure.

Are the religious words true, or is each set of words simply a finger pointing toward the moon? Is there a sense in which words are false idols? Does the meaning of each set of words depend on the human consciousness that hears them and uses them? Do words have meaning only in the context of particular experiences and mindsets?

“Neither an outside observer nor the Subject who undergoes the process can explain fully how particular experiences are able to change one’s center of energy so decisively, or why they so often have to bide their hour to do so. We have a thought, or we perform an act, repeatedly, but on a certain day the real meaning of the thought peals through us for the first time,…” — William James, “The Varieties of Religious Experience”

Janet Smith Warfield is a powerful word sculptress who knows how to bring peace into troubled lives. As wife, mother, grandmother, lawyer, mediator, poet, and author of creative essays, she has been honing her words and wisdom for 40 years. She is a graduate of Swarthmore College and Rutgers School of Law, Camden, cum laude.

For more information, see http://janetsmithwarfield.com

Questions? E-mail jwarfiel@ix.netcom.com

The Primer: Online Sports Betting

You can play bet custom sports like the pros! Get the hottest gaming tips here.

Tie together two of man’s chief leisure actvities and what you’ll get is a vogue we normally know as a sportsbook bets Web location. Is there anything that could be more ingenious? If you envision a troop of sports addicts clapping to support a favorite local lineup, and more often than not lays will be announced alongside the hubbub. Keen to catch a bit of the anticipation, spectators will routinely venture to envisage who is most likely to win in the coming race. In the end, this eventually turns into a friendly bantering race titled sportsbook bets Web location.

To place any bet, you will be best advised to search for a sportsbook bets Web location, that’s to say a place which receives sportsbook bets Web location. In America, you can find no less than four states where to go for sports wagering in a legal manner, but beyond legal you may go for it anywhere you like provided that you determine a bookie *and* you happen to be of legal age. Amongst the sports competitions you can wager on are professional including, too, college basketball & college level football, professional baseball, professional hockey, including, too, wagers on both horse and dog racing. You’ll be able to wager on the comprehensive combined score of a competition or game, on what round a given contestant will be defeated, and even if a given tossed coin in a competition or game will come out either heads or tails.

We can choose between various types of bets– straight, teasers &c., the straight bets, where you simply specify the lineup you’re guessing will win or go down being the best known in sports wagering.

So, why don’t you just have a stab at it and enjoy the fun while you’re at it? But make sure that you won’t get unduly carried away and deplete your complete retirement pension on a fancy! Because you will probably find yourself regretting it for the rest of your life!

Women’s Wages - Is It Justified?

The beginning

God made man and woman, and handed over the reins of this world in their hands. The passing time through centuries, have witnessed the God’s ordinance being twisted by man, to suit his own ends. The inception observed the man and woman treading down the lanes of troubles, hand in hand.

Today

The year 2004 is witnessing all the hustle and bustle of new technologies, economy rising, fast life, and so on. Despite all this, what startles me is the ever-increasing oppression on women, around the globe - be it sexual harassment, cultural oppression, religious impositions, etc. Being a working woman myself, the most attention-grabbing anomaly I come across is the difference in the wages of men and women.

Excerpts of evidence

March 08, 2004 - 20:14, Gulf Daily News by TARIQ KHONJI

“There are many issues that need to be addressed including laws regarding women’s rights and the elimination of discrimination in both the public and private sector,” explained Ms Al Rowaie.

“For example, we hardly ever find women in very high positions. They are usually concentrated in middle-level management, even though their abilities are equal and often exceed those of men.

“We don’t have a woman minister yet, with the exception of Supreme Council for Women secretary-general Lulwa Al Awadhi, who has the rank of minister but not a minister’s portfolio.”

Anne Summers’ book, The End of Equality, paints a stark picture of women’s status in Australia in the 21st century.

Despite winning equal pay for equal work more than 30 years ago, the gap between men’s and women’s wages is larger now than a decade ago. In May 2002, men averaged $839 per week while women were paid just $555 (66% of men’s wages). Figures from the Australian Bureau of Statistics indicate this gap is still growing: between May 2000 and May 2002, men’s wages increased by $58 while women’s rose by only $33.

Holding reins of livelihood!

In practice, employers favor men-workers owing to their belief that men are more devoted to work than women. Women are contemplated to be less reliable because they sometimes take leave to marry, or to have children. Conventionally, men were thought of as the breadwinner, and therefore worthy of a superior wage. In accordance to this, a woman’s salary was supplementary income only.

Today’s scenario contradicts the myth of “supplementary income” earned by women. The awareness and adoption of education for girls have armed them adequately, in order to ease their stand on “equal wages” demand. Despite the sincere efforts of unsung heroes (and heroines), the old practice of discrimination still dominate the employer’s decisions.

What can be done about it?

A quote by Voltaire, “No problem can stand the assault of sustained thinking.” The foundation stone is not laid through a union’s establishment, or passing of a bill in the constitution. The flame of revolution has to kindle up in each person’s heart; that would mark the real change! The idea is not to profess feminist slogans here, rather for justification. When a woman is passing the entire criterion successfully, do not deny her the wages she deserves!

About The Author

Mrs. Julie Sarup, the Mailing List administrator of this group is currently working as Sr. Technical Writer in a German IT company based in India. Software Documentation for the SDLC phases, and New Technologies are her key knowledge areas. In addition to Technical Writing, she has taught Software Engineering to Masters in Science in Information Technology, Gujarat University.

jsarup@rediffmail.com

Lessons From Nature: The Art of Flying

Along time ago I heard this story. I can’t remember where, but I think it is a good lesson that we can learn from nature.

There was a farmer who owned a lot of free range chickens. He was walking in his field one day. Near the side of a tree hidden in the bushes he found a chicken egg. He marveled how far that chicken came, picked it up, took it back and put it in the chicken coup. He didn’t think anything else of it. One day it hatched. From it came an ugly looking chicken.

The chicken had no grace, like the others. It’s neck was short and stubby, it’s beak looked funny. It couldn’t even cluck, because of it. Sometimes it would even trip over it’s own feet, they were so big. Ever so often he would even jump up and down flapping is big, misshapen wings, like he could fly, having a tantrum. The other chickens avoided him. He had a sad life.

One day when he and the others were in the yard, a large shadow crossed on the ground. They all began to run, knowing that it was a bird of prey. It circled back around as he scrambled looking for cover. He heard a loud swoosh. A chicken screamed and all that was left were a few feathers while it was taken up screaming, to be dispatched with. It scared him to death, but he soon forgot like the rest of them.

Almost a week and passed. He saw the shadow again. They all scrambled again, but this time the bird was after him. He tried to run, to duck, to weave, but those big feet kept getting in the way. Suddenly, with a force like a vice, it had him and took him up into the air higher then he could imagine. He was waiting to be killed, when he heard a voice from the wicked bird.

“What are you doing down there with those chickens,” She asked. He was surprised.

“What do you mean? I am a chicken.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said. “You’re an eagle like me.” He was scared, but he shook his head violently.

“I’m a chicken.”

“Well let’s see if you are,” she said. With this she climbed higher and higher and then let him go. He found himself falling, tumbling through space. He knew he was about to die. But then he remembered watching one of the chickens they called the escape artist. It would flap it’s wings every so often and fly over the fence, until they got clipped. With nothing to lose he began to flap his wings. He felt himself slowing down, and to his surprise, he was soon flying. He was soaring, as if he were born to do it. The other eagle came along side him.

“I told that you were an eagle,” she said. He smiled probably for the first time in his life. “Follow me and I’ll take you to meet the rest of your kind.” He smiled and went along, ending up living the life that he was supposed to have live from the beginning soaring from adventure to adventure.

If you find that you just can’s seem to fit in no matter how you try. If you try to act like all of the other people and do the same things that they do, but you just can’t. The problem may just be that you are not a chicken who is meant to run around and scratch for crumbs in the dirt, you may just be an eagle who is born to spread his wings and fly to places unknown. Stop cheating yourself and learn to fly.

Journal on Practical Spirituality, Life, Work and Spiritualty, by J. W. Gilmore at http://www.dswellness.com

Personals - Starting An Online Dating Site

How to start an online dating service business

Making new friends and finding the person of your dreams is not
as easy as it used to be. With the busy daily life of singles in
the US, there is no available time for socialization outside of
work.

Why is online dating service considered a profitable business?
Here are some of the facts:

* Almost .5% of the US population is either single or divorced.
The largest online dating websites have over 700,000 personal
advertisements and profiles all enthusiastically searching for a
partner. There have been thousands of marriages resulting from
internet introduction.

* Internet-based dating services receive millions of dollars in
revenue every year. There is guaranteed money in this business.

* Basic emotional needs are the easiest to sell. These needs
include dating, love and romance. You will be paid by marketing
romance to the increasing number of single web surfers.

If you are thinking on starting up your own online dating
service business, here are four important factors to consider:

1) Online dating business plan: Organizing a plan would allow
you to operate the business and ensure your company’s growth. A
business plan is crucial for organizing and seeking potential
clients. A business with development potential is always a safer
investment than a business that settles for breaking even.

A plan would provide you with a clear view of your business’
future. It summarizes the company’s goals and provides your
future staff to have information that is vital to the daily
function of your company.

2) Website management method. You should plan for a presentable
and quality web design or hire the best web designer in the
industry. Determine which web hosting service is the best and
enroll in it. For your website to attract thousands of visitors,
you would need web hosting that could accommodate all the
traffic and database of your members. You could also consider
being your own web host that would enable you to manage your own
server.

3) Marketing and advertising. The online dating service would
require a large amount of advertising money to be able to set
your company apart from the thousands of other dating services
in existence.

4) Financial plan. Organizing your financial plan would help you
establish the budget necessary to cover your daily operating
costs. This plan would also help your company to develop
long-term financial goals. If you have successfully achieved all
of your plans necessary for the company to run, you could now
start your own online dating service business and give the
singles a chance to meet their dream partner.

Assess Your Stress Using Hari’s Stress Inventory

This is a tool to measure the amount of stress you experience in your daily life. 66 statements are included. Read slowly and carefully, state how far it is true in your case. You may please choose any one of the following five options to each item.

A. Very true, I agree fully
B. True, I agree
C. I cannot say
D. Not true, I disagree
E. Not true, I totally disagree

Once you finish writing your responses to all items, you can go to the scoring key, given at the end. Now start taking the test.

1. I do things in a hurry.
2. I like to travel slowly.
3. I eat food faster.
4. I never interrupt when others talk.
5. I want to finish works with neatness and perfection.

6. I speak slowly.
7. Seeing lazy people I get angry.
8. I never bet with others.
9. I feel tensed on thinking about my responsibilities.
10. I am not happy to wait in a queue.
11. I always consider the feelings of others while talking.
12. I take intoxicants.
13. I pray regularly.
14. I am interested in religious books.
15. My sexual life is not satisfactory.
16. I watch movies and plays.
17. I practice meditation.
18. I don’t reveal secrets to others.
19. I can’t stay away from home.
20. I fell tensed on unexpected arrival of a guest.
21. I feel disturbed on an unexpected expenditure.
22. I have debts.
23. I quarrel frequently with spouse.
24. I feel that some of my family members are against me.
25. I am not properly understood.
26. I feel devaluated in society.
27. I can’t plan my financial budget properly.
28. I am not being loved.
29. I have a lot of family problems.
30. I reach home late.

31. I discus my problems with family members.
32. I have experiences of loosing job unexpectedly.
33. I am often scolded by superiors for coming late.
34. I fear my work place.
35. I quarrel with colleagues.
36. I had been a scapegoat in fight between superiors.
37. I don’t like in engaging in love affairs.
38. I receive confusing and contradicting instructions from above.
39. My job is boring one.
40. I am not paid adequately.
41. My work evokes prick of conscience.
42. I had to bear injustice silently.
43. I am satisfied at work.
44. I am well trained for my work.
45. I get angry soon.
46. I don’t loose opportunities to help others.
47. I believe and spread rumors.
48. I am a patient listener.
49. I am willing to accept my faults.
50. At times I feel like destroying everything.
51. I suffer from headache.
52. I have fre3quent attacks of chest pain.
53. I have poor appetite.
54. I sweat without reason.
55. I don’t get adequate sleep.
56. I have nightmares.
57. I loose control soon.
58. I hate criticism.
59. I feel anxious.
60. I feel calm.
61. I usually regret for what has happened.

62. I fell sorry.
63. I feel frustrated.
64. I am happy.
65. I am confident.
66. I feel worthless.

For more information on development of this inventory, please visit http://EzineArticles.com/?id=48173

Dr. Hari S.Chandran, M.Phil (Psy), Ph.D, PGDPC is working as Cons. Psychologist ,Department of Deaddiction&Mental Health,St.Gregorios Mission Hospital, Parumala. Kerala, drhari7@hotmail.com

This is a questionnaire to measure your STRESS in different life situations.

Once you finish answering, give scores to each response.

Scores 1,2,3,4,5 respectively for A,B,C,D,E.

Qns. 2, 4, 6, 8, 11, 13, 14, 16, 17, 31, 43, 44, 46, 48, 49, 60, 64, 65 should be scored in the opposite order.( Scores 5,4,3,2,1 respectively for A,B,C,D,E)

Find your total score.

If it is above 150, you should find out what makes you tensed, may be your life style… try to change it.

If above 250, you need professional help to reduce stress.

Thanks,
Dr.Hari

Dr. Hari S.Chandran, M.Phil (Psy), Ph.D, PGDPC is working as Cons. Psychologist, Department of Deaddiction & Mental Health, St.Gregorios Mission Hospital, Parumala. Kerala, India drhari7@hotmail.com